Our Collection
The G.O.A.T
dry
The Greatest Of All Time and unapologetically superior. This is the one that started it all. A clean, confident apple cider made from carefully selected apples and crafted with just enough refinement to know better — and just enough attitude not to care.
Crisp, balanced, and simply the best. The G.O.A.T. doesn’t chase trends or beg for approval. It shows up, tips its hat, and reminds everyone why it earned the title.
TASTING NOTES:
• Sweetness: Dry
• Aroma: Crisp heirloom apple
• Palate: Clean, bright apple character with balanced acidity
• Finish: Dry, refreshing, and no BS
THE SNITCH
semi - dry
Two-faced — and proudly both. The Snitch comes in charming and easygoing, leading with a hint of blackberry that feels smooth, curious, and just sweet enough to earn your trust. He nods along, asks a harmless question or two, and lets you talk. A little too much, maybe.
Then, the lime shows up. Bright, sharp, and impossible to ignore, it cuts through like a juicy secret that shouldn’t have been spilled. Suddenly the sweetness feels suspicious, and you’re left to clean up the mess.
TASTING NOTES:
• Sweetness: Semi-dry
• Aroma: Ripe blackberry with a pop of fresh lime
• Palate: Juicy blackberry balanced by bright citrus acidity
• Finish: Sharp, unexpected, and keeps no secrets
The BANDIT
semi - sweet
If something good goes missing around the orchard… don’t bother asking questions. The Bandit has already been through.
He’s quick, quiet, and has a taste for the good stuff — slipping off with the ripest tropical mango he can find and helping himself to the best apples at the farm. Just before disappearing into the night, he leaves behind the faintest trace of serrano — not hot, just a sly little warmth… like the smirk of someone who knows they got away with it.
Smooth, sneaky, slightly suspicious, and dangerously easy to drink.
TASTING NOTES:
• Sweetness: Semi-Sweet
• Aroma: Bright tropical mango with fresh orchard apple
• Palate: Juicy mango and crisp apple balanced with a subtle warm serrano
• Finish: Smooth exit… nobody saw a thing
THE Ol' heifer
semi - sweet
Sweet, assertive, and absolutely convinced she’s right.
The Ol’ Heifer struts in with ripe strawberry sweetness, followed up with a floral lychee finish, and lingers just long enough to let you know she will be speaking to the manager.
Semi-sweet and defiantly bold — this one’s smooth on the palate but sharp on opinions.
TASTING NOTES:
• Sweetness: Semi-sweet
• Aroma: Fresh strawberries with a soft floral lift
• Palate: Juicy strawberry up front, balanced by delicate lychee
• Finish: Smooth, lingering, and asking for the manager
